Offend My Eyes' TOP TEN alternative Christmas songs
When you think of Christmas, chances are you think of Wizard, Slade and maybe even Mariah Carey. To us over here at Offend My Eyes HQ - some of the songs that we hear over the festive season are a little like mince pies - in that we don't really like them, but they remind us of Christmas and so we eat them anyway. With a couple of exceptions, (Fairytale of New York being the first one that springs to mind) most Xmas songs leave us wanting to stick our heads up the Turkey's gaping backside.
That's why we've delved into the darkest hidden depths of our iPods to find some Xmas themed songs that aren't your mainstream bells and twinkles, and actually sound pretty good! Therefore, we proudly present to you, our top ten alternative Christmas songs! We highly recommend playing at full blast once the whole family is seated at the dinner table and about to tuck into their Christmas dinner.
1. The Hives feat. Cyndi Lauper. - A Christmas Duel
Move over Kirsty MacColl, Cyndi Lauper joins The Hives to play a bickering couple in this festive jingle. It's one of our favourites, and a great tune to kick off our list with.
2. Blink 182 - Happy holidays you bastard
It might only be 42 seconds long, but play it 4 times in a row and it's still a better song than 'I'm dreaming Of A White Christmas.'
3. The Eels - Christmas is going to the dogs
It was a choice between this, or The Eels' other Xmas themed song; 'Everything's Gonna Be Cool This Christmas,' but in the end we decided a song about Dogs always wins, and we think you will agree. Enjoy!
4. The Futureheads - Christmas was better in the 80's
Music, clothing, Tv, what wasn't better in the 80's?
5. Fall out boy - What's this?
We nearly included 'Yule Shoot Your Eye Out', but after discovering Fall Out Boy's cover of 'What's This?' originally composed by Danny Elfman in The Nightmare Before Christmas, we changed our mind. *SPOILER* While Patrick's Stump voice isn't half bad at all, and the band's instruments create a great pop-rock fuelled tinge of Tim Burton's cult classic, it just isn't anywhere close to being as good as the original. If you enjoy this though, the official Motion Picture Soundtrack features loads more covers of the film's hit songs by well known artists like Marilyn Manson and Panic! At The Disco
6. Fountains of Wayne - I want an alien this Christmas
It's simple, fun and cheery - Merry Christmas!
7. The Vandals - My first Xmas as a woman
"With Christmas upon us, it's time to be honest, and follow my dreams and to face,
A life of delusion and gender confusion - no longer will be the case."
The Vandals have a plethora of Xmas songs worth checking out.
8. Bad Religion - Father Christmas
In this rather catchy song by Bad Religion, Santa is mugged and beaten up by a gang of kids. Ho Ho Ho!
9. The Knife - Xmas Reindeer
We will have to admit that none of us at Offend My Eyes had heard of 'The Knife' before writing this blog. If the rest of their music is as good as this little gem then we might just have to take a listen.
10. Insane Clown Posse - Santa is a fat bitch
We saved the most offensive for last. You'll either love it, or hate it. We love it, but only you can decide. Happy Axe-mas!
Have we missed a song that should be on this list? Leave a comment below and let us know!